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SELF-PROMOTION!
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Year
of Release: 2000
Directed by: Logan Lee
Ryan DiGiorgi
Writing Credits: Logan Lee
Ryan DiGiorgi
Genre: Comedy
Tagline: 36 combined years on the planet Earth... 7 years since
they met... 4 years of high school... 3 months in rehab... countless
unproduced scripts... 30 Minutes of Video Tape...
Description: The Lazy Bear
Players (as in actors!) Logan Lee, Ryan DiGiorgi, Tommy Paige, and
Kyle Coker star in this comical compilation video that collects four
years of unmatched entertainment and combines it with never-before-seen
shorts, improvs, and all around goofiness from the boys of Lazy Bear
Productions.
Background: So it was their
senior year. Four years in high school, three of which with
access to professional broadcast equipment, and what did our company
founders Logan and Ryan have to show for it? A gazillion scripts
that they never got around to shooting. They were never that
good at staying on task. The few projects that the boys had
started over the years had never been finished. They had a dozen
or so tapes of raw footage and dusty old material just lying around.
So just so they could feel like they had accomplished something in
high school, they took all those videos, finished the unedited segments,
added a few recently shot vignettes, and put them on one jam-packed
video cassette.
Runtime: 30 minutes
“Flex Day”
Cast (in order of appearance)
Logan Lee…………….....….HIMSELF
Ryan Arthur…………….......HIMSELF
Ryan DiGiorgi…………....…HIMSELF
Mr. Wesely Adams……..….HIMSELF
Amy Akin…………….....…HERSELF CAMERA…………….Ryan DiGiorgi
Logan Lee
William Bergh ---------------------------------------------- “Der Frühling Tag 1999” Cast (in order of appearance)
Logan Lee…………...…………….HIMSELF THE “TAKE
THE MIKE BOYZ”.………Anthony Tankard
Jay
Jerel Robinson
Terence Faulkner Coach Wendy Hart...…...……..….HERSELF
Coach Hart’s Dog…...……...…….HERSELF
Random hall people…........….THEMSELVES
Hunter Hackett…..........…........….HIMSELF
Bob Christian…………...…...........HIMSELF
“don’t take the mic girl”….........…..HERSELF
“read my pants girl”………….........HERSELF
Paul Cameron………...……......…HIMSELF
Mr. Ryan Bult………………..........HIMSELF
“Senior Treat moms”…...........THEMSELVES
Sam McCree……………......…….HIMSELF
Molly McClary…………….......….HERSELF
Ryan Arthur……………….............HIMSELF
Steve Kraski…..…...……..........…HIMSELF
David Justice……..……........……HIMSELF
“The Three Slackers”..............THEMSELVES
John Paul Penrod….…...…….........HIMSELF CAMERA………………..Ryan DiGiorgi | “It Came from Joel Schumacher”
(the cinematic trailer)
Cast (in order of appearance)
Chris Adams....KEVIN/TIM BURTON GUY
Caitlin King………….....…………...SUSAN
Ryan DiGiorgi……....JOEL SCHUMACHER
BEACHTREE BERT
Arial Bauman………...………...NEON GIRL
Tommy Paige………...……….NIPPLE GUY
Rachel…...…...….....SCREAMING GIRL #1
Erin…...…………....SCREAMING GIRL #2
Steve Kraski...…….…...RUNNING GUY #1
Matt Schreiber…......…..RUNNING GUY #2
“STOP HIM” GUY
Eric Butler…..……….....RUNNING GUY #3
Adam Wade…………....RUNNING GUY #4
Todd Rogers……...…....RUNNING GUY #5
FIGHT GUY #1
Woody Herbert…..… .RUNNING GUY #6
FIGHT GUY #2
Erin Michael………...SCREAMING GIRL #3
Danielle Rice..…………...CRAWLING GIRL
Kyle Coker…...………....DRAIN PIPE GUY
NEWS ANCHOR
Seth Worley……...…...“BELIEVE ME” GUY
Kimberly Bayliss.......…………….….KAREN
Stephen Shaver…..…………..……SHERIFF
Logan Lee..…..……….….LITTLE NICOLA
Anthony Heald………DANIEL LONGDALE CAMERA…………..……Logan Lee
Ryan DiGiorgi
Brad Montgomery
John Gibson BOOM MIC…………...…...…Kyle Coker
Logan Lee
Tommy Paige Unused segments shot by Tommy Paige ---------------------------------------------- “A Very Short Film by Logan Lee” Cast (in order of appearance)
Chris Adams……..…..……….HIMSELF
Logan Lee…………HIMSELF/Bob/Judy STAND-IN
FOR MR. LEE…………...Ryan DiGiorgi CAMERA...…………..Ryan DiGiorgi
Bekah Thompson |
MUSIC |
TROUBLE BLUES
Written by Charles Brown
Performed by John lee Hooker
Courtesy of Travis Music
HEY NOW
Written and Performed by Ray Charles
Courtesy of Trio Music/Ft. Knox Music
LOVE GROWS
(WHERE MY ROSEMARY GOES)
Written by Tony McCauley and Barry Mason
Performed by Edison Lighthouse
Courtesy of Madacy Records
CAN'T BUY ME LOVE
Written by John Lennon and Paul McCartney
Performed by The Beatles
Courtesy of EMI Records Ltd.
HELLO DOLLY
Written by Jerry Herman
Music Scored and Conducted by
Lennie Hayton & Lionel Newman
Peformed by Louis Armstrong
and Barbra Streisand
Courtesy of Phillips Records
HAIR
Written by Galt MacDermot,
Gerome Ragni, James Rado
Musical arranged and conducted
by
Galt MacDermot
Performed by John Savage
Courtesy of RCA Records, BMG Entertainment
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C'EST SI BON
Written by Seelen/Betti/Hornez
Performed by Louis Armstrong
Courtesy of Intercontinental
Records and Cassettes Inc.
THE GAME
Written by George Sanger
Performed by Robert Harrison
Courtesy of Virgin Interactive Entertainment
MOOD INDIGO/SOPHISTICATED LADY
Written and Performed by Duke Ellington
Courtesy of Madacy Music Group Inc.
BOW-TIE DADDY
Written by Frank Zappa
Performed by The Mothers of Invention
Courtesy of Ryko Records
HE'S A REBEL
Written by Gene Pitney
Performed by Alisha's Attic
Courtesy of Unichappell Music, Inc. |
Edited by: Ryan DiGiorgi
Additional Input and Directing by: John Paul Penrod
Trivia
• Logan and Ryan’s Wacky Comedy Hour was never conceived
as the half hour-long behemoth it became. Logan Lee and Ryan DiGiorgi
ended up having to stay after school on the same day and decided to
do a video to pass the time. The segments of Logan roaming the halls
and Ryan interviewing Mr. Adams were all cultivated from this material,
however, since this was going to be a loose collection of skits anyway,
the boys decided to finish some small projects they had let slip by
the wayside and include these on the tape as well. The “Can’t
Buy Me Love” scene, and It Came From Joel Schumacher! were in
need of extensive finishing work, while most of Der Frühling Tag
1999 and A Very Short Film by Logan Lee were simply tacked on in their
already finished form.
• The light piano music at the beginning of the Larry’s
Party Supply Store skit that opens the film was being played by Ryan
Arthur as part of an unrelated rehearsal. When he noticed us, he came
over unannounced and became part of the skit.
• The Larry skit was shot in the lighting booth of the Brentwood
High Theater. All props were found on-scene.
• Though some of the skits are shown in black and white or widescreen,
these are simply artistic effects. All footage was shot in color and
full-frame.
• Both Ryan and Logan do indeed despise Joel Schumacher with a
passion, but would gladly work with him to break into Hollywood.
• For years, Ryan considered this film his best overall editing
work. That honor now goes to The Package.
• When the “Can’t Buy Me Love” footage was originally
filmed, the scenes weren’t timed to the song. The crew just filmed
until they couldn’t think of anything else and assumed they had
enough. When Ryan began to edit, it became clear that about twice the
footage was needed, especially because he had decided to run it in fast
motion. The only solution was to use behind-the-scenes shots and outtakes
as well. This is why several clips show Logan and John Paul Penrod directing
and setting up shots. Luckily, in fast motion, anything looks neat.
• Because this was a compilation video spanning three years, viewers
can track the progress of Logan Lee’s hair and goatee throughout
the film, with the least amount being in Der Frühling Tag 1999
and the most being in the Flex Day vignettes.
• All of the Flex day vignettes were improvised, which explains
Logan cracking up after a prop door nearly takes his head off.
• This is the only Lazy Bear film to have a recorded commentary.
The recording was substandard, but it may be made available in some
form in the future. On a humorous note, a picture of Dan Aykroyd was
edited in after the end credits to support a joke made in the commentary.
• When Ryan dubbed a copy of this movie for Logan, he used the
standard set of stickers that come with a blank video cassette to categorize
the film as “ADULT PARTY SPORTS”.
• Though this is simply a compilation video with no plot, it’s
Logan and Ryan’s favorite Lazy Bear film.
• All music was chosen for it’s uniqueness. Most was found
on jazz compilations from Brentwood High School’s TV Productions
archive.
• The opening credits list Little Nicola and Beachtree Bert as
the stars of the film. These were just fake names Ryan made up, never
intending to use them. Little Nicola references the girl mentioned in
the “Magical Mystery Tour” movie and album, and Beachtree
Bert was based on a pack of Beech-Nut gum. However, the names actually
came in handy. They were given to Logan and Ryan’s unnamed characters
in the It Came from Joel Schumacher! trailer. This marks the first time
Logan has played a character with a name that didn’t contain “Logan”.
• The “Jason David Frank as the Monkey” credit comes
from a private joke between Lazy Bear Players Kyle Coker and Ryan DiGiorgi.
The same credit appears during “A Very Short Film by Logan Lee”,
a film within this film.
• Ryan had just seen “Monty Python and the Holy Grail”
again, which inspired the long and pretentious opening credits.
• One of the alternate language versions mentioned as being available
in the opening credits is Loganese. Most viewers either read over it
or don’t get to it in time. Logan claims he’d be happy to
record such a version.
• A possible sequel that would provide the other half hour of
this thirty minute “comedy hour” is being discussed.
• The Wanda character mentioned in Blender
Agenda and seen in Dr. Logan’s
Day Out is referenced in the catering credit “Wanda’s
House of Horse”.
• Logan got a headache from the weighted “hat” that
Ryan Arthur gives him in the party store scene.
• Storage 27 was indeed a storage room and not a bathroom as Logan
says.
• Someone can be seen briefly in the lower left of the screen
when Logan walks downstairs before the door sequence. Logan leans over
the railing, ready to include them in the zaniness, but they run off
to quickly.
• GOOF: During the Flex Day skits, Logan’s
shoes change from Sandals to boots.
• The shots of Mr. Adams used in the interview are faded slightly
to white due to strong backlighting.
• Ryan conducted a legitimate interview with Adams, then new questions
were filmed and Adams’ responses were rearranged. This gag has
since become a standard on Logan and Ryan’s college
radio show.
• A slight beep can be heard during the interview. It was the
beginning of an announcement over the school’s PA system. Bits
of the announcement can be heard faintly in the background of some shots.
• When asked if he has anything else to say, Adams response has
been heard as either “I will dominate” or “I will
not mate”. Logan and Ryan refuse to comment on which was the actual
response.
• The Lazy Bear writers use the phrase “Lazy Bear symbol
comes together” at the beginning of almost every film they write,
but the Der Frühling Tag 1999 sequence was the first place
it was actually implemented, though the symbol had appeared at the end
of several other Lazy Bear flicks.
• It took three people, Logan, Ryan, and John Paul Penrod, to
edit the intro to Der Frühling Tag 1999, due to the many different
effects being applied at once. Now, though the Lazy Bear staff has honed
it to a one-man process. Notice that the credits appear over a faded
white background because the staff hadn’t mastered chroma key
yet.
• The intro to Der Frühling Tag 1999 was achieved by Ryan
running down the halls of Brentwood High with the camera set on strobe.
Logan and John Paul followed in hot pursuit, directing all the way.
• As mentioned in the film itself, Der Frühling Tag 1999
was originally much longer until Ryan pulled his biggest Lazy Bear blunder
and lost one of the raw footage tapes. Additional scenes included sneaking
out of Spring Day and blowing up a cop car. Also lost was the scene
leading up to the “Can’t Buy Me Love” scene. This
consisted of Logan interviewing Molly (the girl you see chasing him
in the “Can’t Buy Me Love” scene) and constantly calling
her Caty, her twin sister’s name. Eventually she gets so upset
that she begins to chase him, hence the “Can’t Buy Me Love”
bit. Yeah, we were stuck for an ending…
• As is recounted on www.lazybearproductions.com:
The Album, Ryan ran into “Don’t take the mic girl”
a few years later while interviewing people for a school project. She
had apparently changed schools and was back for a visit. Though she
seemed marginally more astute than when they had last met, Ryan wisely
kept the microphone a safe distance away from her.
• Logan’s hand briefly goes into the mouth of Coach Hart’s
dog. He narrowly escapes injury. Check
it out.
• Logan has no brothers, contrary to what he tells Coach Hart.
He does have three sisters, though, one of which served as PA on Dr.
Logan’s Day Out.
• The moms at the senior treat table are giving away Citra Cola,
which is no longer being produced.
• Nick Kraski, the name Logan uses at the senior treat table was
that of a senior in his Drama II class. Nick declined to appear in the
“Can’t Buy Me Love” chase scene, though all of the
others in that scene were from that class. When Ryan entered the class
and asked who wanted to come chase Logan around, the response was astounding.
• You can see a health class doing laps in the background of the
“Can’t Buy Me Love” scene.
• The “Can’t Buy Me Love” sequence was filmed
on the same field as Spring Day, about three days later. Logan bravely
wore the same clothes.
• It Came from Joel Schumacher! was filmed during Spring Day the
year after Der Frühling Tag 1999 was shot. Originally the Lazy
Bear Players wanted to take another stab at recording the Spring Day
festivities, but opted for this new project instead.
• Ryan can be seen waiting for his cue through the back window
of the car right before he attacks as Joel Schumacher.
• Logan cracked up every time Ryan plastered himself against the
car window as Joel.
• Caitlin King who played Susan in the opening of It Came from
Joel Schumacher!, didn’t deliver a convincing enough scream, so
a scream Erin Michael recorded was used.
• In the freeze frame of Caitlin screaming, you can see her gum.
• It Came from Joel Schumacher! involved the most non-regular
Lazy Bear cast members of any Lazy Bear film, excluding interviews.
Logan and Ryan literally corralled anyone who didn’t look busy
to scream and run for this project.
• Long-time Lazy Bear Player Tommy Paige is still ashamed of his
role as “Nipple Guy”, yet it’s one of the film’s
most popular characters.
• Nipple Guy’s rubber nipples were actually plastic bottle
caps.
• Logan can be seen filming in the bathroom mirror during the
Nipple Guy scene.
• Kyle actually crawled into a real drain pipe for his brief running
and hiding scene in It Came from Joel Schumacher!
• When Seth Worley slams his hand on the desk after saying “Why
don’t you believe me?”, he is in obvious pain.
• Joel Schumacher’s wig was borrowed from Drama teacher
Mrs. Moody, who also loaned out Judy's wig for “A Very Short Film
by Logan Lee”.
• The Lazy Bear crew snuck into the unlocked Brentwood High concession
stand for one of Joel’s maniacal laughing scenes. Though free
candy surrounded them, all resisted the temptation.
• Kyle’s newscaster character wears a makeshift tie borrowed
from Chris Adams, who plays Kevin.
• As revealed in the outtakes after the film, Kyle’s news
bulletin is an illegible note written by Ryan on the back of the script.
• It Came from Joel Schumacher! was written for a contest Wizard
Magazine was holding, though it wasn't finished in time and was never
submitted.
• The original script for It Came from Joel Schumacher! was misplaced
and much of the trailer was re-written or improvised on the spot.
• The only song mistakenly not credited was the music for It Came
from Joel Schumacher! It was “The Game”, written and produced
by George Sanger, vocals by Robert Harrison from “The 7th Guest”
soundtrack.
• The X-Men shirt Joel wears is a reference to his bad reputation
with comic book fans thanks to his two awful Batman sequels.
• GOOF: When Ryan, as a zombified citizen, mutters
“kill da heroes,” he is still wearing Joel’s X-Men
shirt.
• Logan’s locker at Brentwood High was used in one scene.
Notice several stickers for crab meat on the door. Don’t ask.
• Stephen Shaver who plays the sheriff is a real-life policeman
in training.
• The green house in which Logan’s Little Nicola character
thrusts a rake at the screen was demolished soon after filming and replaced
with portable classrooms.
• The clip of “8MM” was used because it featured Anthony
Heald, a frequent collaborator of Schumacher’s. Heald is credited
despite the fact that no permission to use the clip was ever obtained.
(Once again, we made no money off of this film, so don’t sue us.)
• When Ryan was dubbing a copy of this film, TV Productions teacher
Mark Madison walked by the screen just in time to see his name and the
phrase “nude jell-o wrestling”. Needless to say he had some
questions.
• Although it appears to be one take, it took several tries and
several hours to get the acceptance speech for A Very Short Film by
Logan Lee just the way Logan wanted it. Ryan edited the best of the
takes together and used shots of Bob and Judy to hide the cuts.
• Logan refers to his hair in A Very Short Film as his “Hitler
haircut”.
• Logan wears a Felix the Cat tie and Superman watch while accepting
his award.
• The award was a statuette of a nude woman. It was given to drama
teacher Mrs. Moody as collateral when Logan and Ryan borrowed the Judy
wig for the cut-away shots.
• The glasses Logan puts on to read his acceptance speech belonged
to Todd Rogers who played Running Guy #5 in the Joel Schumacher trailer.
They were a VERY powerful prescription. This combined with the Dr. Logan
glasses have all but ruined Logan’s vision.
• The people clapping and chanting over the credits of A Very
Short Film sound like they’re saying “Logan! Logan!”,
but they aren’t. The sound was a generic clip taken from a sound
effects CD.
• Bekah Thompson, who provided second unit camera work for Blender
Agenda, shot the insert shots of Bob and Judy. Logan and Ryan actually
pulled her away from basketball practice for this purpose.
• Every time Logan puts his glasses on while making his acceptance
speech, he nearly smacks himself in the head with the award. This is
known as Lex Luthor Syndrome, a reference to the DC Super Powers action
figure of Lex that tended to punch himself rather than his enemy.
• Ryan wrote the “Read a Book” PSA in a matter of
minutes on the day it was due. Logan stayed after school to be in it
as a favor.
• Thanks to the book PSA, Caitlin King remarked that whenever
she sees Logan she is reminded to read. Ryan is happy to have had a
positive effect on the community.
• The library was already closed by the time the boys shot the
book PSA, but the librarian kindly let us in anyway. The card she used
to check out the books was randomly pulled from her files, meaning a
random student had several books checked out and then checked back in
on his or her card.
• Watch carefully and you’ll see that the book PSA begins
to fade to black, comes back up, and then fades completely. This was
because this was not the original copy of the PSA, but one that another
student had clumsily edited onto an archive tape. The original had been
erased.
• The last Flex Day skit was shot in the actual girl’s bathroom
at Brentwood High. Amy Akin, our kind actress, made sure the coast was
clear before calling Logan and Ryan in. Unfortunately, no one thought
to check the smaller faculty bathroom connected to the main facility.
As the group discussed the scene, an English teacher emerged from the
stall, glanced at the two guys with camera equipment, and walked out.
• Almost all of the outtakes from Comedy Hour are from It Came
from Joel Schumacher! due to lack of raw footage from most of the other
projects.
• Unused interview segments were show by Tommy Paige and never
used in Comedy Hour, including Logan interviewing a group of students
about Black History Month. The outtake footage of Logan talking to Mr.
Bult about Joel Schumacher is from this session.
• The coat worn by Joel Schumacher would later become the Dr.
Logan coat.
• Logan’s “Waaaa Waaaa Waaaa” upon being discovered
in the girl’s bathroom is a reference to the way his Dr. Logan
character screamed while escaping peril in Blender
Agenda.
• If you stick around way past the end credits, you’ll be
treated to a blurry picture that comes into focus on a girl’s
backside. This slightly revealing footage was shot by mistake, while
Ryan was trying to focus the camera, but no audio was recorded. Ryan
dubbed in a voiceover later at Logan’s request to make it funnier.
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